Taking care of a newborn is no joke. I'm thankful that I heeded my brother's advice to engage a confinement lady (CL) for the first month. She cooked for me (lots of ginger and sesame oil, and red date tea), took care of PJ, washed PJ's clothes and did some house cleaning. That first month, I bled aplenty, perspired buckets and teared a lot.
Yes, u've read correctly. Teared a lot. Hormonal changes, physical changes and sense of cluelessness and apprehension as a new mum. But every time I let it all out, I would feel better after that.
And so the days went by with pretty much of a routine. Wake up, breakfast, feed PJ, rest a (short) while, feed PJ, lunch, feed PJ, bathe, feed PJ, rest, feed PJ, rest, feed PJ, dinner, feed PJ, rest, feed PJ, sleep. Of course, with many of PJ's cryings and the other things that the CL will help me with. Just feeding PJ is enough to zap me out. Both of us are learning about each other and about breastfeeding. She learning to latch on and feed, I learning to latch her on and feed. Though the routine repeats itself everyday, every day is still a different experience.
Then came the day that the CL left. It's now me, my mum and PJ at home alone. My mum helps out with the washing and cleaning, while I feed and took care of PJ primarily. The first few days were tough. PJ was probably not familiar with me (since the CL was the one who took care of PJ), hence cryings were common throughout the day. Waking up for her midnight feedings (I wanted the hubby to sleep because he has to work) and caring for her in the day was tiring physically. To make things worse, PJ is a very wakeful baby who seldom nap in the day, and always needed to be fed and someone to play with her. I was practically doing nothing more than feeding, soothing, feeding, soothing, feeding and soothing her throughout the day.
After a few days, I broke down in front of the hubby.
The hubby then became the knight in shining armour. He volunteered to take turns for PJ's midnight feedings, even though he has to work the next day. Every night, he would also put PJ to bed after the last feeding so that I can go to bed earlier. My hubby is so sweet, seriously.
Things are better this week. Thank God. By God's grace and mercy, PJ now takes a short nap in the afternoon, finally. Her night feedings reduced from 3 to 2, we don't know why but are totally glad about it. We pray that this somehow gets set as a routine. But what didn't change is her constant need to be fed and soothed. I'm learning to accept it too.
Motherhood is a journey of constant learning. I thank God that in this journey, I have the support of my wonderful (knight in shining armour) hubby, family and friends who have been through it and offered many help. Still need to learn and learn and learn, and pray for God's strength to sustain me every single day.
Do pray for me too, that I will keep a sane mind and incredible strength to fulfill my role as a mother! Here's a photo to end off!
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| my little PJ napping peacefully |
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